Jesse and I are in fact gay. With each other. No doubt. I introduced him to my whole family and he did the same for me.
-Cam
Friday, July 9, 2010
Ponoka, Cam's view
Alright so this is after the fact and no one is reading this crap anymore, this is mostly to get one more gay joke off at Jesse.
We got to Ponoka, which is basically five houses on a highway with a Subway and 4 liquor stores. Maybe there were more, maybe there were less. Fuck it. Jesse's parents ruled. His dog, ruled. Ren, the bathroom cat, ruled. The room I stayed in was his brothers room which had a TOILET IN IT AWESOME!
Also if you ever wonder what Jesse looks like with long hair just ask to see a picture of his brother.
We met up with Jesse's friends like he said, but it wasn't so much a BBQ as it was a LGBT convention. They threw it in Jesse's honour of course.
Speaking of throwing in Jesse's honour, after Jesse was done gaying off with his old friends, I threw up in his house! FUCK YEAH. AMERICA. LGBT!!!!!!!
-Cam
We got to Ponoka, which is basically five houses on a highway with a Subway and 4 liquor stores. Maybe there were more, maybe there were less. Fuck it. Jesse's parents ruled. His dog, ruled. Ren, the bathroom cat, ruled. The room I stayed in was his brothers room which had a TOILET IN IT AWESOME!
Also if you ever wonder what Jesse looks like with long hair just ask to see a picture of his brother.
We met up with Jesse's friends like he said, but it wasn't so much a BBQ as it was a LGBT convention. They threw it in Jesse's honour of course.
Speaking of throwing in Jesse's honour, after Jesse was done gaying off with his old friends, I threw up in his house! FUCK YEAH. AMERICA. LGBT!!!!!!!
-Cam
Thursday, July 8, 2010
The End?
So, here I am, sitting in my room in Vancouver. My roomie said to me, "You should do an outro entry, letting everyone know that you guys made it home and stuff." Here goes!
After leaving Saskatoon and arriving in Ponoka, AB, Cam and I actually skated for the first time since Los Angeles. A new skate park had just been built, so it was kind of a fun experience. In fact, that's pretty much all that we did in Ponoka, minus hanging out with my old friend, Jace, for part of a day. I miss that guy.
Oh, and Cam got his first hangover of the trip! Yeah, seriously, one night of drinking with my old crew put Cam over the top! He even threw up! He didn't actually wake up til 3pm! PONOKA'D!
So yeah, after Cam fought off his hangover, we loaded up a bunch of equipment with my brother and mother and headed off for Bluesfest 2010. I used to play at it every year, but then I moved to Vancouver, so I haven't been to it in about 4 years. It was fun coming back to it, free food and music! Cam and I didn't touch booze this night, though. Our bodies couldn't take it, so we just ate a tonne of food and enjoyed a relaxing evening that included someone riding a wheelchair across a GIANT FIRE. Good times!
On Sunday, July 4th (MR. EAGLES BIRTHDAY), at about 3:30pm, we boarded a Greyhound in Red Deer, AB, bound for Vancouver. We stopped for about an hour and a half in Calgary, checked out Millenium Skate Park and just hang around. We then endured the worst bus trip, in terms of sleep, through the Rockies through the night. At roughly 8:15am, July 5th, we stepped off of the bus... just shy of exactly 30 days after we had boarded a bus from the exact same platform.
So, where did we head?
BON'S! Where the hell else would we go?! That was a nice welcome-home.
Now I need a job.
And Cam needs a liver.
Any takers?
I sure hope that this isn't the end of the adventure.
Suck it, Trebek
After leaving Saskatoon and arriving in Ponoka, AB, Cam and I actually skated for the first time since Los Angeles. A new skate park had just been built, so it was kind of a fun experience. In fact, that's pretty much all that we did in Ponoka, minus hanging out with my old friend, Jace, for part of a day. I miss that guy.
Oh, and Cam got his first hangover of the trip! Yeah, seriously, one night of drinking with my old crew put Cam over the top! He even threw up! He didn't actually wake up til 3pm! PONOKA'D!
So yeah, after Cam fought off his hangover, we loaded up a bunch of equipment with my brother and mother and headed off for Bluesfest 2010. I used to play at it every year, but then I moved to Vancouver, so I haven't been to it in about 4 years. It was fun coming back to it, free food and music! Cam and I didn't touch booze this night, though. Our bodies couldn't take it, so we just ate a tonne of food and enjoyed a relaxing evening that included someone riding a wheelchair across a GIANT FIRE. Good times!
On Sunday, July 4th (MR. EAGLES BIRTHDAY), at about 3:30pm, we boarded a Greyhound in Red Deer, AB, bound for Vancouver. We stopped for about an hour and a half in Calgary, checked out Millenium Skate Park and just hang around. We then endured the worst bus trip, in terms of sleep, through the Rockies through the night. At roughly 8:15am, July 5th, we stepped off of the bus... just shy of exactly 30 days after we had boarded a bus from the exact same platform.
So, where did we head?
BON'S! Where the hell else would we go?! That was a nice welcome-home.
Now I need a job.
And Cam needs a liver.
Any takers?
I sure hope that this isn't the end of the adventure.
Suck it, Trebek
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Saskatoon
Round Two!
You know what we're doing in Saskatoon? NOTHING
Well, we made some killer burgers at Robbi's last night and drank like fifty beers. Today will be the day that Graeme finally gets himself a slice of the ol' butt pie! Well hopefully, if he's not too busy stealing all the doods away from Jesse.
So Jesse and I are officially a couple. I brought him home to meet my mom and I will be meeting his parents sometime tomorrow morning. Yup. Just in case there was any doubt in anyone's minds.
Booze is far too expensive. We can't justify it anymore. $9.99 for a 6 pack? Give me a fuckin' break! I'd rather gouge out my eyes with a rusty melon baller.
Stay tuned for a lesson in love making from Minnesota!
-Cam
You know what we're doing in Saskatoon? NOTHING
Well, we made some killer burgers at Robbi's last night and drank like fifty beers. Today will be the day that Graeme finally gets himself a slice of the ol' butt pie! Well hopefully, if he's not too busy stealing all the doods away from Jesse.
So Jesse and I are officially a couple. I brought him home to meet my mom and I will be meeting his parents sometime tomorrow morning. Yup. Just in case there was any doubt in anyone's minds.
Booze is far too expensive. We can't justify it anymore. $9.99 for a 6 pack? Give me a fuckin' break! I'd rather gouge out my eyes with a rusty melon baller.
Stay tuned for a lesson in love making from Minnesota!
-Cam
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Minneapolis!
The song - Tourette's
The word - Puke breath....shoes
The place - Butt country
Our last real stop in AMERICA! HOME OF MR EAGLE
We got off the bus from Chicago to greeted by the lovely Crystal. You know what was on her license plate?
A fucking EAGLE. YEAH. Jesse shit a brick.
First stop? Sculpture garden to see a giant cherry on an even bigger teaspoon. It was here that the three of us came up with America's new economic action plan. Similar to the make work project of the 20's of building America's intensive freeway system, we decided that everyday the giant spoon should act as a catapult for the cherry, launching it towards city hall, destroying it everyday, then re-building. Imagine the jobs! At least 40 people would need to co-ordinate their efforts to all jump at the same time to launch the cherry far enough. Then the clean up crews, rebuilding labour, medical staff and eventual protestors. Hundreds of jobs right there. Get to it America.
Soon after this (and a much needed shower) we found ourselves in a pontoon in the Missisipi River being fed a booze they called, "River Water". Wait what? Jesse and I thought about how ridiculous it was that THIS was how our invasion of America was ending. Drinking free booze on a boat in the middle of the ol' Missisip. I was trying to convince everyone that I would wrestle and eventually tame an alligator for the purposes of extended travel down the river. They told me there were no alligators. You know what I have to say to that? Suck it Trebek.
So two River Waters and three alligators later, we ended up in a hotel room, Jesse making out with at least eighty guys again. We had the most booze I've ever seen there. Especially for three people. A 60 of gin, courtesy of Jesse and I, Crystal brought like... 6 bottles of booze. I can't even remember what she stocked the fridge with. What a babe.
No we didn't finish it all, Crystal was not impressed and told us we drank like we were from Montana, not Canada. Keep in mind this is the girl that helped us wizard staff the fucking roof in San Francisco.
We left at 8 this morning bound for... don't judge... MANITOBA, THE PUKE PROVINCE
Please excuse me while I vomit all over my shoes.
-Cam
The word - Puke breath....shoes
The place - Butt country
Our last real stop in AMERICA! HOME OF MR EAGLE
We got off the bus from Chicago to greeted by the lovely Crystal. You know what was on her license plate?
A fucking EAGLE. YEAH. Jesse shit a brick.
First stop? Sculpture garden to see a giant cherry on an even bigger teaspoon. It was here that the three of us came up with America's new economic action plan. Similar to the make work project of the 20's of building America's intensive freeway system, we decided that everyday the giant spoon should act as a catapult for the cherry, launching it towards city hall, destroying it everyday, then re-building. Imagine the jobs! At least 40 people would need to co-ordinate their efforts to all jump at the same time to launch the cherry far enough. Then the clean up crews, rebuilding labour, medical staff and eventual protestors. Hundreds of jobs right there. Get to it America.
Soon after this (and a much needed shower) we found ourselves in a pontoon in the Missisipi River being fed a booze they called, "River Water". Wait what? Jesse and I thought about how ridiculous it was that THIS was how our invasion of America was ending. Drinking free booze on a boat in the middle of the ol' Missisip. I was trying to convince everyone that I would wrestle and eventually tame an alligator for the purposes of extended travel down the river. They told me there were no alligators. You know what I have to say to that? Suck it Trebek.
So two River Waters and three alligators later, we ended up in a hotel room, Jesse making out with at least eighty guys again. We had the most booze I've ever seen there. Especially for three people. A 60 of gin, courtesy of Jesse and I, Crystal brought like... 6 bottles of booze. I can't even remember what she stocked the fridge with. What a babe.
No we didn't finish it all, Crystal was not impressed and told us we drank like we were from Montana, not Canada. Keep in mind this is the girl that helped us wizard staff the fucking roof in San Francisco.
We left at 8 this morning bound for... don't judge... MANITOBA, THE PUKE PROVINCE
Please excuse me while I vomit all over my shoes.
-Cam
Monday, June 28, 2010
Chi-Town
Pizza. Mother, fucking, pizza. I can't believe I've never seen deep dish pizza outside of Chicago. It was like taking a pie, but making it a pizza instead.
I generally rate food by how it compares to the size of my bowel movements (most things for that matter) and I have never taken a shit larger than that pizza. Thank god. It took 45 minutes to prepare and I'm positive that many Bothan's died to bring me that 'za.
Chicago was an incredibly gigantic city, only surpassed by L.A. on the trip. Well I guess that's because it's the third largest in the States, next to Ell Eh and New Why. We didn't do a whole pile here, our hostel was a half an hour out of the downtown core and we had come here on a whim anyways. On top of that, the hostel we booked turned out to be the "No-Fun Tolerated" hostel. No booze (WHAT?!), check out at 9:30AM, no one allowed in the hostel between 11AM and 2PM, a kitchen you wouldn't want to use, no lockers, bathrooms like you're back in gym class, there was a common room but it was just full of chairs that were covered in white sheets. It felt like we had stepped into an about to be horror movie location. Seriously fuck that hostel.
Jesse made out with so many guys. Probably like, a hundred. He got all their phone numbers too, it was great. Great work team!
-Cam
I generally rate food by how it compares to the size of my bowel movements (most things for that matter) and I have never taken a shit larger than that pizza. Thank god. It took 45 minutes to prepare and I'm positive that many Bothan's died to bring me that 'za.
Chicago was an incredibly gigantic city, only surpassed by L.A. on the trip. Well I guess that's because it's the third largest in the States, next to Ell Eh and New Why. We didn't do a whole pile here, our hostel was a half an hour out of the downtown core and we had come here on a whim anyways. On top of that, the hostel we booked turned out to be the "No-Fun Tolerated" hostel. No booze (WHAT?!), check out at 9:30AM, no one allowed in the hostel between 11AM and 2PM, a kitchen you wouldn't want to use, no lockers, bathrooms like you're back in gym class, there was a common room but it was just full of chairs that were covered in white sheets. It felt like we had stepped into an about to be horror movie location. Seriously fuck that hostel.
Jesse made out with so many guys. Probably like, a hundred. He got all their phone numbers too, it was great. Great work team!
-Cam
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